Friday, June 25, 2004
A horrible betrayal
Thanks to the keen eyes of one of my faithful supporters, a horrible and uncouth betrayal was discovered. It was to my horror and utter disgust that I realized my accountant had been skimming off the top and cooking the books, in hopes of keeping the vast majority of donated funds for his own greedy, selfish purposes. Who knows how many millions he has siphoned, sabotaging my journey? OH THE HUMANITY, I have only $2.03 now, and Pooky just threw up on my crayons, so that pretty much takes care of what little funds I have. Had.
I confronted my accountant, and although he started screaming something about sheep urine making the keyboard keys stick together, I had him dipped in Gravy Train and thrown into a cage with Tim the Sheep, who was starved and crazed after 3 days of eating naught but leeks and watching naught but Gigli. It was a long and painful death, but fitting for one who would rob a young boy of his childhood dream of raising sheep on Mars.
Tim is fed, I am taking care of my own accounts, and it is ONWARD WE MARCH, my friends. For nothing is going to keep me down. Oh no. I got to keep on moving.
I confronted my accountant, and although he started screaming something about sheep urine making the keyboard keys stick together, I had him dipped in Gravy Train and thrown into a cage with Tim the Sheep, who was starved and crazed after 3 days of eating naught but leeks and watching naught but Gigli. It was a long and painful death, but fitting for one who would rob a young boy of his childhood dream of raising sheep on Mars.
Tim is fed, I am taking care of my own accounts, and it is ONWARD WE MARCH, my friends. For nothing is going to keep me down. Oh no. I got to keep on moving.
